Calming strategies

Helping your child feel calm and well regulated

Children can sometimes become overwhelmed, anxious, frustrated or highly alert. When this happens they may react by shouting, running away, refusing activities or becoming upset. These reactions are often a sign that your child is struggling to manage their emotions, stress levels or sensory experiences.

When children are very upset, they are unable to think clearly or learn effectively. Helping them to feel calm and safe is the first priority.

Signs your child may be becoming overwhelmed

Your child may:

withdraw from activities
seem restless or unable to sit still
have difficulty concentrating
find it difficult to listen or follow instructions
become more anxious, emotional, irritable, angry or upset

Calming activities to try

type of activity	examples
breathing and relaxation	slow, deep breathing blowing bubbles listening to calming music. Headphones can help to reduce distractions sitting in a quiet space
movement activities	wall push-ups chair push-ups stretching gentle forward and backward swinging activities on hands and knees pushing or pulling objects tug of war games
hand activities	squeezing a stress ball stretching elastic bands around fingers using fidget toys playing with Blu Tack, playdough or therapy putty
deep pressure activities	firm hugs. Only use this method if your child enjoys hugs rolling up in a blanket using a weighted lap pad or cuddling a weighted cushion or teddy
everyday activities	carrying shopping bags pushing a shopping trolley helping with laundry unloading the dishwasher hoovering or mopping the floor putting out recycling gardening: digging, carrying watering cans and pushing a wheelbarrow
drinks and snacks	drinking through a straw or sports bottle drinking smoothies, yoghurt drinks or thick shakes eating different types of food like crunchy, soft, salty and spicy foods
calm spaces	safe space away from busy environments where your child can calm down before returning to activities tent or den create a quiet corner with cushions or beanbags, favourite books or fidget toys, weighted cushions or blankets soft lighting

Top tips

stay calm and use a gentle voice
look for early signs that your child is becoming overwhelmed
offer calming activities before things get worse
build movement and sensory activities into the daily routine
focus on helping your child feel safe and understood
remember that every child responds differently

Remember

All children feel overwhelmed from time to time. By helping your child understand what helps them feel calm, you can support their emotional wellbeing, concentration and participation in everyday activities. Small, regular calming activities throughout the day can often prevent stress and anxiety from building up.